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Happy March 4th!

Many years ago, King Clyde Glunk faced a dilemma. His kingdom was about to come under siege by the Romans as they advanced through Europe.rnrnThe King stepped onto his balcony and addressed his people..

“My citizens, we have a grave decision to make. The Roman army is approaching and we are badly outnumbered with no chance of victory. If we fight, we will most likely be overrun with very few survivors left to tell our tale. However, if we abandon our small kingdom to flee and hide throughout Europe, our culture will be lost and forgotten in the sands of time. I will not order you to fight. Instead, I leave the decision to you, good people. Shall we face the oncoming onslaught and fight to defend our way of life, or shall we run? I shall return in the morning for your answer.”

The next day, King Clyde Glunk, weary from a sleepless night, made his way to the balcony to once again address his people.

“Good people, I ask you. Do we run and hide? Or do we head onward into battle?”

There was silence as a lone representative from the crowd made his way to the front. He stopped, and looked up at his King. He removed his hat and began to speak…

“Your Majesty,” he said, “as your loyal subjects, we have discussed this long into the night. We have weighed every option, and have come to a solid conclusion.”

“What say you?” asked the King.

“We shall not run and hide. We shall… MARCH FORTH!”

And that’s how we came to celebrate this holiday. May you and yours have a glorius March 4th.

– Respects to Sam Sunderman

As my regular visitor(s) know, I love movies. Extra love for movies shot in my hometown of Pittsburgh. A few of the greats…

Innocent Blood: Great John Landis comedy/horror film in the same vein as American Werewolf In London. Not only does Innocent Blood have a great plot, memorable characters and show off the city in a great way, but the vampires in it are actual blood sucking killers. Not sparkly little emo idiots in dire need of a good ass kicking. Fun movie all the way through.

Striking Distance a fun Bruce Willis vehicle that has some wonderful cinematography a decent plot with a few forgivable problems, but easily makes up for it with the characters and plot twists. Great movie to eat popcorn by.

She’s Out of My League:Great date movie. This romantic comedy features the classic “Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.” Or something like that. Fun flick.

I wold be remiss if I didn’t also mention Zack & Miri Make a Porno. Kevin Smith delivers another fun ride with this comedy set, and filmed in, Monroeville. Laugh out loud funny. ‘Nuff said.

However, the number of stinkballs being filmed in my beloved city is growing. The inspiration for this post came from watching Unstoppable aka Unwatchable. So here’s the deal. A train gets away while its engineer steps off to sign some autographs or something, and begins a journey through Wester Pennsylvania at a high rate of speed while pulling several cars of toxic, highly explosive, zombie chemicals, and ONE grain car (it’s important). Along the way, we encounter plot holes you could drive a train.. well you get the idea. I’m no engineer, no expert on trains larger than HO scale, nor have I ever attempted to stop an actual train. But, you don’t need to be a rocket surgeon to figure out how to stop this one. Denzel, please start reading these scripts before signing anything. (Seriously, dude. You’re better than this. Leave that crap for Wesley Snipes.)

Anyway, I’m sure I’ll be chiming in on this more from time to time. Meanwhile, enjoy.

Jim Says; “See you next Wednesday.”