Jim Says:”I celebrated 4/20 on January 5. Because I can reduce fractions!”
“It’s like, Dude, how did they know? That’s so creepy, right? My boss must be in the illuminati or something. Man, I bet they have drones tracking $20 bills so they can figure when it’s being spent on weed. I hear they put a chip in each bill so satellites can track them.”
“Dude, you backed into a police car.”
“Yeah, but it was the government that arrested me. Fascists!”
Jim Says:”If you’re doing something illegal, don’t advertise it, stupid. What are you, high?”